|
[04 Feb 2009|09:35pm] |
i can't believe how much has changed over the past four years.
four years ago, i was 17. four years ago today, maryanne died. three years ago today, aaron, joe, and bundy came to rutland and i had a big crush on joe. dylan showed up at denny's. that was...something. two years ago today, i was miserable in boston. one year ago today, i hooked up with a guy for the first time after having a crush on him for awhile. which failed, but whatever
and today, i wrote a 12 page paper in one day, so i can drive 5 hours south for the weekend.
i'm not trying to compare maryanne to any of these things. and i'm not going to talk about her, really. not the place.
i've just been thinking all day how much has happened in four years. it doesn't feel like any time at all has passed, but i don't know, i'm so fucking different.
|
|
|
[01 Feb 2009|11:46pm] |
instead of doing homework i just made tofu honey mustard dip. yesterday i made lentil curry dip. the day before, i probably made hummus.
i can't stop. but that's okay. i need to get so much reading done, but i've done NOTHING all day longggggggg ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh. except like almost slice my thumb off, awesome. and watch several hours of television about polygamists.
i guess i'm going to northampton again this weekend. and also boston for a night. and im going alone. scary.
|
|
|
[29 Jan 2009|01:59am] |
so it's really weird to be in a canadian university, taking a class on colonial america, being "taught" things i learned about new england when i was like 15 after just returning from massachusetts less than 24 hours before. and to hear someone "is that where the first thanksgiving came from?"
DUDE. YES.
colonial america makes me so motherfucking nostalgic. <3squanto<3.
in other news, i'm really happy. except for this snow storm.
|
|
|
[23 Jan 2009|01:15am] |
so i just read my wall-to-wall with everyone i've ever had sex with. not that there was a wall-to-wall with some of them. apparently i'm a masochist.
it's cool, i'm bored. my forehead is breaking out like a 14 year old sweaty boy. with braces. and bad hair. fuck it.
so this weekend will rule. either way it pans out. two options. either 413 in 514 or 514 in 413. i'll know...by saturday.
man. I'M BORED. i think the only thing i use this for anymore is curing boredom my regressing to age 15. and pretending it's blurty. OH PS I FOUND EVERYONE'S BLURTY! duuuuuuude. dude. dude.
Who are you?
dianeyfish. if you're my dad and i'm nine, that is.
What are you thinking about right now?
whether or not joe will feel better and then everyone will come to montreal.
Where do you want to be right now?
um. well, it's freezing and snowing, and i'm alone in my bedroom, with a head band on. so whatever, really.
Who did you last text?
chris.
Who did you last talk to on the phone?
my dad this morning.
How do you feel right now?
nervousz0rs
This summer who was your best friend?
sarah
What was the last graduation you went to?
emily's! dude.
Last December where were you in life?
montreal and rutland
Do you miss your past?
yeah i do, but i'm cool now too.
Your last kiss..
Was it good?
yeah it was. i was freaking out and being awkward, but it was okay, haha.
Who is the last person you talked to on IM?
emily i bet you anything
Last thing you drank?
um a gin and tonic at like 11
Last person you left a comment?
uhhhhh ana?
Are you stressed?
kinder
Want to say anything?
hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.
How old will you be in 15 months?
TWENTY TWO AND A HALF.
Was yesterday better than today?
they were both decent
When is the last time you saw your mom?
january 4th
What is your favorite color?
purple mountain majesty. duh.
Do you smile often?
yeah i get laugh tan lines
Have you ever had a life threatening injury?
noope
Last time you cried?
the night i left rutland, i was super stressed out. and then ew i was really mad.
Are you currently texting anyone?
why yes
Do you have someone of the opposite sex you can tell everything to?
if im with them, then yeah, but not that i can call up and talk to.
What did you do friday night?
ummmmmmm was going to go to a show, but just got drunk and went to a bar and then to the concordia art building to look at people's paintings. at like 1 30.
Who pissed you off yesterday?
no one really
What do you currently hear right now?
the cookies- stranger in my arms
Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 months from now?
maybe i will!
Do you get distracted easily?
hmmm not really at all
What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night?
read
Is the last person you kissed mad at you?
not at all
What can't you wait for?
SPRING
If you could push one person off of a mountain, who would it be?
hahahaa dude i totally know the answer to this. and know who would agree with me.
What are you doing tonight?
sweeping
When was the last time you had fun?
watching bad tv with hanna and sarah a few hours ago
Who was the first person you talked to today?
sarah. no, actually my dad.
Have you ever gotten in a fight with someone, and never made up?
no. never.
Do you think age matters in relationships?
totally depends on the people, and where they are in life.
Do you have any friends that you've known for 10 years or more?
of course
How did you get your most recent bruise?
...i ran into a counter, fuck you
Who was the last person you cooked for?
im sure it was sarah
If you could say something to the last person that hurt you what would you say?
that they are a GIANT DOUCHE BAG but still kind of cool, but you should NOT have pulled yeah we'll be friends and hang out without hooking up bullshit, because i haven't seen you in months AND YOU'RE SHORT. and uh yeah
Do you miss the way things used to be?
i really do. parts, anyyway.
Are you over your past?
over it, yeah.
Have you ever played hard to get?
i am so fucking bad at this. if i play hard to get, it's probably because im freaked out and dont want to be in a relationship. if i do, im wicked "easy" HAH.
Where is the next place you will travel to?
burlington? haha, doesnt count.
What were you doing at 8:00 this morning?
sweeping.
Do you say sexy a lot?
i don't
What is something you currently want?
ahhhhhhh.
Do you want to get married & have children one day?
yes i dooooo
Have you ever gambled in a casino?
yep, it sucked! im so not into that
Do you like to have long hair or short hair?
I WANT MY LONG HAIRRRRRRR i want to feel girly. FUCK YOU WINTER
What was the last thing you bought?
vegetables for making salsa and an apple
Where do you keep your money?
...wallet?
What was the weather like today?
TWENTY SEVEN DEGREES thank god
Would you pass a drug test?
yep
Last vacation destination you went to?
cruisezor? yeah i guess that
|
|
|
[21 Jan 2009|03:34am] |
|
I CAN'T SLEEP.
|
|
|
[14 Jan 2009|12:28am] |
googling budd dwyer, a politician who shot himself in front of a press conference was not the thing to do before going to bed! so here we go!
( Read more... )
|
|
|
[01 Jan 2009|11:59pm] |
surreal surreal surreal.
new years in northampton was incredible. happiest party i've been to in soooo long.
my nose is stuffy and a cat peed on my clothes, but whatever. it's fine.
|
|
|
[24 Dec 2008|11:45pm] |
|
AHHHH im going to new york city friday/saturday with my mom, emily, and her friend. THE NEW YORK DOLLS ARE PLAYING SATURDAY NIGHT. OH MY GOD. two original members, BUT I DONT CARE!!!!!! im so fucking going.
|
|
|
[23 Dec 2008|10:01pm] |
well alright then. my past few days have been high school themed. tonight i went to a rutland hockey game to pick up sarah's little sister (15) and her friend and it was surreal. all of the kids, yelling and screaming, like this is the most important time of their life. a kid that was on my school bus in elementary school got kicked out for yelling "fucking".
surreal's another theme. i ended up getting snowed in in western mass from thursday-monday morning. i had one pair of clothes. it was great though.
and now it's christmas eve. WHAT.
|
|
|
[18 Dec 2008|12:50am] |
|
OH MY GOD craigslist personals are fucking hilarious....especially because i've found two guys from my high school in the past 20 minutes. one of them had a crush on me. holy shit, my life is alright.
|
|
|
[17 Dec 2008|11:40pm] |
i live "in town" now. in rutland. it makes me feel like laura ingalls wilder, when her family moves into de smet, instead of living out on the homestead.
ah man. i feel weird, which is the only time i ever write here, obviously. i feel really distant from a lot of things from the past, which makes me not feel guilty about anything, because i don't feel like it happened to me. i wish i could see this as an end to awkwardness, but i know it's just apathy. i'm going to northampton tomorrow, maybe hanover friday, and going out (!!) in rutland on saturday. i'm happy about that, but i'm also really tired and feel weird about it. i really wish i had a legitimate crush that was persuable, and not bullshit. everyone is so all over the place, location wise. which is cool, and doesnt usually bother me, i just wonder why i haven't found what i have ALL OVER NEW ENGLAND in montreal, the city i live in.
|
|
|
[07 Dec 2008|09:01pm] |
i don't understand how some people have gotten this far being this inconsiderate. my cat is meowing at me with concern because im laughing really hard at a picture of an anteater.
my friday night successfully combined so many social groups i have had throughout the last six years. it was actually pretty insane. i always have a lot of fun in burlington.
some guy in a bar: what's your name?
me: diane
sgiab: leah?
me: diane
sgiab: leah?
me: diane.
sgiab: andrea?
me: DIANE
sgiab: i like your body.
|
|
|
[29 Nov 2008|10:46pm] |
dude. fucking sweet ass weekend. got home at 3 AM wednesday, my mom was awake somehow and the three of us played with her NEW PUPPY. awesome. so stayed up until 4 30, did that. thanksgiving was whatevs. there were lots of people i didn't know. randoms. heh. so yeah, after dinner a bunch of girls came over and we got drunk on the floor of my mom's kitchen. awesome.
so friday was a rutland kinda day. bagel cafeeeee, price chopper, you know. and so then sarah, emily, caroline and i went to holyoke. soooo gooooddd. at first it was weird (walking through the front door at aarons? some dude i've never met was like BUY ME CHAPSTICK as i was going to buy cups. what the fuck) so yeah, show was really good. and then it evolved into a dance party in which i was covered in wine, amaretto, and beer. i smelled AWESOME. so at 1:30 wally kicked everybody out, except for some. my arms are covered in "hbc" in green sharpie. typical. ended up sleeping on the floor with seven sheets, a jacket, and a scarf.
got back to rutland, had cocktails with my mom, emily, our child hood best friends and their mom. i then fell asleep on a couch at 8, and just woke up.
oh dear.
|
|
|
[26 Nov 2008|01:04am] |
i feel like such a lame college student lately. popcorn for dinner, with fingerfuls of peanut butter for good measure. diet energy drinks to stay awake, nyquil to go to sleep.
i update more when i'm discontent. i update more when i feel 15, and my jeans are too tight, and i have no one to...hang out with. and by hang out with, i mean wait around til they call, then awkwardly chat, then hook up with.
i canNOT shake this nostalgia. i need a new phase. or an old one. just something different, this waiting for nothing is boring the shit out of me.
whatever, i go home for a few days tomorrow night. holyoke friday. rutland the rest of the days. NOT EVEN MENDON, RUTLAND. ugh. ughhhhhh. my hoooouuuuusssseeeeeee.
fuck it. my mom has a new puppy.
i just feel like typing write now. i wonder if anyone reads this anymore. few people update anymore. not that this update actually updates you on anything.
just downloaded this song, it rules. lyricxzcxcxvxzzxs post.
lover's day- tv on the radio
Oh but the longing is terrible,
A wonton heart under attack.
I wanna love you,
All the way off,
I wanna break your back.
Colour of all that's hysterical,
Travels along your bones.
Just to be near you sucking your skin,
Not gonna leave you alone.
Yes here of course there are miracles,
A lover that loves that's one.
Groomed with the laughter,
Ecstatic disaster,
Come let's arouse the fun!
We could build and engine,
Out of all your rising stars.
Tear apart the apart,
We seem to think we are.
Call of work let's lay!
Call it lovers Day!
Call it lovers Day!
Give me the keys to your hiding place,
I'm not gonna tear it apart.
I'm gonna keep you week in the knees,
Try to unlock your heart.
You're gonna turn me animal,
You’re gonna turn me dumb.
Your kiss in the night,
Bringing the light,
You’re like the rising sun.
I hunger for you like a cannibal,
Not gonna let you run.
[Lover's Day Lyrics On http://www.elyricsworld.com/ ]
I'm gonna take you,
I'm gonna shake you,
I'm gonna make you cum.
Swear to god it will get so hot,
It’ll melt our faces off.
Then we can see,
The you the me,
Beyond mirrors outside clock.
Held naked in the light,
Held gently,
Held tight,
So soft!
Get off!
Get off!
Ball so hard,
We’ll smash the walls,
Break the bed,
And crash the floors, don’t!
Stop! Laugh and scream!
And have the neighbors call the cops!
'till all the eyes that they've seen our fire play!!
Can't forget,
Mark it down,
Call it lovers Day!!
Yes here of course there are miracles.
Under your sighs and moans.
I'm gonna take you,
I'm gonna take you home.
|
|
|
[24 Nov 2008|12:37pm] |
|
top 25 most played songs on my ipod. this is good, if only for the last "Song"=
keep the car running-arcade fire
not a substitute- jay reatard
mornings- japanther
police on my back- the clash
100 dollar boots- the yarbles
river phoenix- japanther
cavalier eternal- against me!
no survivors- gbh
upside down from here- atom and his package
martha my dear- the beatles
wasted- black flag
every conflict through history- joey r
suspect device- stiff little fingers
mysteries- yeah yeah yeahs
un annee sans lumiere- arcade fire
wasted- black flag...again?
funeral- japanther
devil town- bright eyes
machine gun etiquette- the damned
fuk tha prince a pull iz dum- japanther
tender people- japanther (i loved this album, okay?)
horror business- the misfits
black mirror- arcade fire
THE "DEAN SCREAM"- HOWARD DEAN.
no seriously, how the fuck did that get there.
i hate myself. off to go study.
|
|
|
[19 Nov 2008|01:53am] |
i spent all day long writing an 18 page paper about the greek civil war and analyzed the visual media that came out of it so I NEED AN INDULGENCE.
Psychoanalyze Yourself; Don't read ahead, just answer the following questions with the first thought that comes to mind. Then read which each answer means at the end. (No cheating!)
1. You are walking in the woods. You are not alone. Who is with you?
emily. wait no, she would never be in the woods.i have no idea. i suck at answering already
2. You are walking in the woods. You see an animal. What kind of animal?
rainbow! my dog that died. shut up, he's alive in the simulation.
3. What interaction takes place between you and the animal?
i pet him! we play 'wild dog', i rub his stomach and he goes currrrazy
4. You walk deeper in the woods. You enter a clearing, and before you is your dream house. How big is it?
pretty big, but not overwhelming
5. Is your dream house surrounded by a fence?
nah
6. You enter the house. You walk into the dining room and see the dining
table. What is on it?
a nice centerpiece, and nice place settings
7. You exit the house and a cup is on the ground, what kind is it?
wine glass
8. What do you do with the cup?
put it in the sink. or swirl it around with my fingers
9. You walk to the edge of the property where you find yourself standing at a body of water, what is it?
a big ol' pond. almost a lake
10. How will you cross the water?
i won't, i'll just hang out on the dock.
After you copy and paste into a new bulletin, and answer ALL the questions above you can look down here.
The ANSWERS
1. The person who you are walking in the woods with is the most important to you.
2. The size of the animal is representative of your perception of the size of your problems in your life.
3. The severity of the interaction you have with the animal is representative of how you deal with your problems.
4. The size of your dream home is representative of the size of your ambition to solve your problems.
5. A lack of a fence is indicative of an open personality. People are welcome at all times. The presence of a fence indicates a closed personality. You'd prefer people not drop by unannounced.
6. If your answer did NOT include food, flowers, or people, then you are generally unhappy.
7. The durability of the material with the cup is made of is representative of the perceived durability of your relationship.
8. What you did with the cup is representative of your attitude.
9. The size of the body of water is representative of the size of your sexual desire.
10. The way you cross the water is representative to how easy or hard you expect your life to
be.
heh, weird. okay, i'll take it.
|
|
|
[08 Nov 2008|01:26pm] |
oh, hey high school
|
|
|
[03 Nov 2008|01:30pm] |
so i have two cats now. on canadian thanksgiving, we were having people over, and one went outside to talk to his girlfriend on the phone....and came back with a friendly little kitty. we called her turkey.
anyway, the point of this story is turkey is declawed, ike is not. yet they still fight, as they are in my room right in front of me, and i swear turkey always has the upper hand. i almost just typed "ike is a pussy" but that is far too ridiculous.
anyway, cats rool.
i wish like...more than anything i could have a dog though.
my room is a DISASTER right now. i don't care.
i'm driving to rutland tonight, i have to give sarah a ride home from voting.
DUDE VOTING IM SCARED
|
|
|
[27 Oct 2008|02:13pm] |
it's really bizarre that (ex)girlfriends my exes date after me are so similar. not to me, but to each other. that was a really weird way of putting it, but it's so true.
i went to burlington last weekend.
i'm more homesick than i EVER have been since leaving home after high school. not just for rutland, but for massachusetts, and burlington (i know i never lived there). it's weird. montreal is weird lately.
|
|
|
[05 Oct 2008|05:03pm] |
|
i turn 21 tomorrow. woah. woooooahhhhh.
|
|
| navigation |
| [ |
viewing |
| |
most recent entries |
] |
| [ |
go |
| |
earlier |
] |
|
|
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
mmgoatcheese's journal